tuesday meme

because i stayed up late last night watching a care bears movie with mara important programming on international politics with mara, i’m really tired today and until i get some coffee, you get a meme:

1) When I was a kid after school I: went home and watched the mickey mouse club.

2) This one time when I was high: if you know me, you know that my life is too weird to make it weirder on purpose with drugs

3) The New Pope: someone i approach cautiously until i know more.

4) I fall asleep easily: with the help of 100 mg of benadryl

5) I need more: liquid assets and vacation.

6) I need less: stupid questions from people too lazy to think about the answer.

7) Public toilets are useful for: providing a slightly less scary option than the port-a-john.

8) The United States should change its name to: the land of no wild monkeys

9) My theme song would be: after all, dar williams

10) Sometimes I think people: should dance because it’s fun and not worry about what they look like when they’re flailing like a spastic monkey.

11) Prescription drugs are: what keep me going during pollen season

12) The middle finger is most useful: when grabbing the last migraine pill out of a tall, narrow bottle.

13) The last time I bought a pair of shoes: a few weeks ago at payless. they’re green (shocker)

14) In one month: i will be studying political theory. [softly weeping and rocking]

15) For the last time: please don’t eat the daisies.

16) The last thing I stole: your liver heart.

17) If I won the lotto, the first thing I would buy: the balance of all my debt (boring, but true)

18) When in Rome: wear a toga wand stroll through the streets with a harp. if people ask if you’re all right tell them you’re nero and here to finish the job.

19) If only I could get rid of: this annoying sneezing habit.

20) Your mom: is hiding from you.

21) When I’m on death row my last meal will be: really unhealthy. think orange hostess cupcake deep fried and covered in butter.

22) The last person who talked to me: crazy mara. we discussed care-a-lot castle, tenderheart bear, and the care bear stare the cost of prescription drugs, law enforcement, and, most likely monkeys.

23) I mostly use the internet: to find random stuff. you people say some weird things.

24) When I’m President: pigs will fly.

25) I most resemble: today: blinky mcblinkerson the kleenex-handed captain of the h.m.s. sneezaroo.

26) The word I say too much is: monkeys

27) Vegas is great for: a city that reaches 125 degrees by 9 am in july.

28) Michael Jackson: why do i think that guy is so weird?

29) The Speed Limit means: drive that speed plus 9 to avoid a ticket.

30) When I die I want my body: that’s a good enough sentence as is

31) If I could go back in time I’d: go to hill valley high school’s “enchantment under the sea” dance

32) The last time I said “this sucks” I: was probably writing a paper.

33) You obviously know me well when: you invite me over to play guitar and drink pinot noir until 2 am

34) Tomorrow I will: drink too much coffee, work, go to school, meet with delta force.

35) I spend too much time: procrastinating paper-writing

36) The last thing I broke:my bank account.

37) Oh yeah and don’t forget: donations always welcome.

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2 responses to “tuesday meme

  1. your #30 is quite amusing. :)

    in my last will and testament, it will say, ‘and by the way, i want my body. i always have, there i said it.’

    i also liked #21, cause i’m in that one.

  2. Thirty seven is an odd number to end on, but nonetheless, a very good list. Perhaps I should crib it and do my own. Yeah… I’m sneaky that way… all ninja like.

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